Criminal Welp Weekend

As militia members are aware, the Goon sponsored 'Burn Amarr' was a hubristic goonie act of bravado, marketing failure, and just a normal weekend for the Madirmilire and Niarja trade-pipe systems.

The only thing unusual was the thousands of cheap, fail-fit T1 catalysts employed by the seemingly bankrupt Goonswarm, who relied on sheer brute force numbers, rather than quality, to commit criminal acts.

For all the spectators that showed up, entertainment was provided by second and third string bumpers of suspicious quality, and goons who still are learning about optimal range.  ( a special shout-out to the fail-gank Tornado. )

The security status of Amarr,  Ashab and other high security systems proved too difficult for the cheap Goon crapalyst fleet to overcome. Desperate to avoid a PR disaster of "Fail Burn", the goonies turned instead to the more favorable criminal hunting grounds of the trade-pipe of Madirmilire and Niarja, and hoped no one would notice the event venue had changed.  Their dreams of overthrowing the Empress in Amarr was abandoned as goonie pride was now at stake.

What was abundantly clear, was the goonie hostility to any pilot who tried to interfere with this major Goon PVE event of the year.  Freighter ganking is all about racing the clock, to tip over "space cows" before the PVE police show up to prevent it.  The real pilots who show up to interrupt their space game against the police bots are met with an unusual amount of anger and resentment, expressed in the forms of taunts and jeers practiced in elementary schools everywhere.  And as the FCs learned of the unauthorized live Twitch streams, It can be said that one side had a hearty good laugh.

Goon line members were treated to such thrills as:

• counting to 3 for undock, with mixed and hilarious results 
• pressing F1.  One Key. Best Key!
• riding the red fleet short-bus for a handful of minutes the entire weekend
• spending the remaining scores of hours station-tanked against CONCORD. Grr!
• sperging local with all their free time to combat their other PVE nemesis - boredom
• their choice of Goonie Twitch streams in 2 different flavors - 15 minute delay or Live stream.  ( you're welcome, AG Intel! )

Of special note, militia member Brad Neece fitted a 'Mad Stabber' and bumped freighters right before criminal blob warp-ins.  This caused the goonie FCs so much gastric distress, that Brad received many [favorable] mentions on the twitch streams.

Also of valiant mention, militia member bigbud skunkafella remembered he had received a free Raven that was gathering dust in the hanger.  And in the waning hours of this criminal field trip to High Sec space, decided that the Welp Gods needed a smartbombing sacrifice to make up for the sorry state of 'Burn Amarr'. Well done, sir! 56 kill-mails were earned against the criminal blob and over 100 million ISK was paid in bounties to bigbud.  And the few score of kill rights were enjoyed by all.

Everyone can rest assured, that Amarr and the Empress have nothing to fear from the Goons, or the pretender to the throne: seventh-clone yet first-of-his-pants.

UPDATE:

On a certain unnamed goon site, the Goons are claiming victory, that "Amarr lay in ashes" and that the total ISK destroyed was over 800 Billion, the biggest year yet. To accomplish this accounting trick, they openly admit they are combining the numbers from all surrounding systems, including the Mad-Niarja trade pipe, PLUS the CODE operation in Uedama that had been running the week prior and the weekend concurrently.  They also admit that a certain "Dickbutt" who stole 250 Billion ISK from Miniluv, had returned 150 Billion, and paid 20 Billion to CODE in order to join and return to gangland-style ganking... because he was bored yet again.  

So it can be said that the 3 day "Burn Amarr" and week long operation "Distress in Uedama" was bought and paid for by a clone who is bored beyond measure.

Burn Amarr was an unquestionable failure as the loss numbers are below previous years, undoubtedly     a result of the bargain-basement ships the Goons fielded, and the goonie focus on comic-spectacle as opposed to results.

The separate- and nowhere near the Empress or Amarrian space - CODE operation in Uedama generated more ISK loss with better quality ships and far fewer criminal numbers, but lasted twice as long.

One can imagine the goonie marketing and branding department furiously ship-spinning the numbers to turn their "Fail Burn" into something "better than average".  Perhaps they are considering adding the weekend Hek numbers as well?

Fly Courageous

Fly Honest

Fly Safe

The High Sec Militia